image: http://rainmaker.fm/series/draft/
Improvements
One way that I improved my draft was by adding a little more statistics to my paper. I also, changed the way my conclusion was organized. Oksoon made a comment that my F.P did not match the one from y introduction. She said that it should match because the paper did not make sense the way I organized it. Therefore, I changed some sentences in my conclusion. I have not yet but I am in the process of adding more information to my paper and adding all the sources I used to my works cited.
Irina improved her paper by organizing her paper a little different. She also added a little more information to it. It looks like she tried to add more of her opinion to it.
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